| Author | Message | ||
| M. Kathryn Black
Senior Member Username: kathryn Post Number: 2510 Registered: 09-2002 |
One Perfect Moment For one perfect moment I let go– and it’s gone sailing into the sky, one black balloon pricked by a passing branch–one hundred crows fly as a cloud to summer lands. A sleek night feather falls to my feet as a reminder to forgive, forget, and continue walking wherever my feet take me. I will sew rainbows over my heart, tattoo love in my hands. (c)2005 | ||
| E V Brooks
Advanced Member Username: lia Post Number: 1165 Registered: 12-2003 |
Kathryn, a fine read. I feel that the heart of the piece is the word 'reminder'. Wonderful image of crows and the final sentence. Much enjoyed. lia | ||
| LJ Cohen
Moderator Username: ljc Post Number: 2412 Registered: 07-2002 |
Kathryn, Love these lines: A sleek night feather falls to my feet as a reminder to forgive, forget, and continue walking wherever my feet take me. This feels a stronger ending than the rainbows/love image. best ljc | ||
| M. Kathryn Black
Senior Member Username: kathryn Post Number: 2511 Registered: 09-2002 |
Lia, Thanks for reading; I'm pleased you enjoyed the piece. Lisa, I wanted to keep the stanzas symmetrical, but I know what you mean. Thanks. My best to you both, Kathryn | ||
| Kathy Paupore
Advanced Member Username: kathy Post Number: 2096 Registered: 12-2003 |
Kathryn, enjoyed. I esp like "one hundred crows/ fly as a cloud to summer lands." Also the lines Lisa mentions and her suggestion where to end is good. Maybe just rework the lines to keep the symmetry.  K | ||
| Coastmoor
New member Username: coastmoor Post Number: 5 Registered: 07-2005 |
M Oh that black balloon and a cloud of crows slewing I read sew two or three times thinking it should be sow, so long since i've done any sewing or knitting i guess. Thanks Coast Wherever you are going, here you are www.coastmoor.co.uk | ||
| M. Kathryn Black
Senior Member Username: kathryn Post Number: 2515 Registered: 09-2002 |
Kathy, Thanks for your suggestions; I'll give them some thought. Coast, Hi! That's an interesting idea. Thanks for offering it. My best to you both, Kathryn | ||
| Bren
Advanced Member Username: bren Post Number: 931 Registered: 12-2001 |
Hi Kathryn, I'm impressed by the feather a reminder to forgive and forget. I love the first and last part of the movie Forrest Gump where the feather floats in the scene and back out as he tells his story. Your feather reminds me of that. : ) Bren | ||
| M. Kathryn Black
Senior Member Username: kathryn Post Number: 2521 Registered: 09-2002 |
Bren, Thankyou. I've always loved feathers. Here it is a symbol of forgiveness as you've caught on to. In Native American mythology crows are spirit animals. Best, Kathryn |
